Trash Review

There used to be a time when people could look to Hollywood for reaffirmation of what is "right." "Leave It to Beaver," "The Waltons," "The Brady Bunch," even "Family Matters" helped show what is appropriate for American behavior. But now, we are bombarded with situational bias, blinded to the consequences. And by situational bias, I mean the message that says 'If YOU do it, it's okay and justified.' After seeing "She's Just Not That Into You," I am going to have to say the age of Hollywood morality is over.

I recently saw this movie with my family. My dad bought the tickets; otherwise, my husband and I would have left and got our money back. The movie is set up as a half documentary, half fictional film that follows the lives of five women. Each woman has a different life situation: the online dater, the desperate dater, the married woman, the adulteress (I doubt H. would label her that), and the committed but unmarried woman. In every case, men appear as liars, cheaters, and players. The movie makes it look like women must (and do) trap men into relationships, often using sex to accomplish their means. I would like to watch the movie again to be able to write down exactly what the characters say that makes it so morally crippling. But then that would mean I would have to watch it again...

Anyway, back to the men, the woman narrator walks us through how we (women) are fed lies about men and relationships--that if a guy is mean to you, uses you, cheats on you, does anything that hurts you, it is because he really really likes you. The movie tries to work through this point, so women would figure out that it is wrong. On this point, the movie holds some moral binding. But what woman at the age of 25 doesn't know this? If someone hurts you like they listed, obviously it is not a healthy relationship. Unfortunately, men are not the "exception, but the rule." If you are a man, you are screwed. You are doomed to ruin women's lives until you marry them. Until then, you are a horrible person, so live with it. This is as far from the truth as possible. I only know three men who live a life as described above. The rest are honest men who are very respectful and wouldn't dream of hurting other people on purpose for their own gains. Which makes me wonder for our new generation: will the young men in our country absorb these messages like in this movie, and start to believe that it is okay to act that way? That because it is known and accepted as a cultural fact, that it is okay to cheat on women and treat them like trash? This point critically concerns me.

Another point, as I realize this is getting lengthy, is the issue about the adulteress. *Warning spoilers, but honestly don't go see the movie* This woman meets a man in the grocery store. He is attracted to her, but says he is married and he can't "do this." She gets his number anyway, and low and behold, we have to witness a seduction take place. (My husband and I were just cringing in our seats as we had to watch this happen). He rejects her twice when she calls, but her friend encourages her and justifies her actions of "stealing" this husband because "it could be her true love." That makes perfect sense right? =/ Anyway, the husband caves because he isn't happy in his relationship and feels like he was tricked into marriage. I don't know if the rest of the audience felt like it was okay that this was happening. I didn't feel that way. I wanted to slap the man. However, the way it ended, with the husband divorcing his wife who forgave him and wanted to work it out until she realized he continually lied to her, made it look like it was for the best. The adulteress got mad at him and never wanted him to touch her again but now she is very happy pursuing her career (true love right?), the ex-wife moved on with her life, and the ex-husband who says "marriage? what's there to miss about it." All of this makes me so angry. Everything sacred about the covenant of marriage is destroyed in this movie. If you want to sleep around, GO AHEAD. If you want to wreck a marriage for your selfish gains, GO AHEAD. If you think men are scum bags, YOU ARE RIGHT.

There are so many things wrong with this movie that I could keep going and going and going. I would even expand on the show "The Girls Next Door." But I will save you that rant for another time. Either way when we have children we need to be excessively careful about what they see and digest. Otherwise they will come to accept what Hollywood is throwing out there as hegemony. And that will be a dark, joyless, painful society.